I say "theoretically" because we have these horrible neighbors who own a racecar. Seriously - it's an actual racecar. They like to rev the engine at all hours of the day and night, including 9 in the morning when some people are trying to sleep off a night of obsessive reading.
This morning I snuck the dog into the bed after John went to work at 7AM. (Don't tell.) And we're both minding our own business, snoozing away, when suddenly a sound louder than thunder comes booming from everywhere. (Have you ever heard a racecar engine?) The dog, who never barks, leaps from under the covers in a fit of YIPE YIPE YIPE! The combination of both send me practically into a coronary event.
I've been awake since, watching bad daytime TV and having conversations with my doggie, who is still looking suspiciously next door at the bad racecar people, who are still revving their engine every so often. By the way, when did they replace Bob Barker on The Price is Right??
MIYAGI: Why do you look so tired?
ME: I stayed up too late reading and now I can't sleep any longer because of our awful racecar neighbors.
MIYAGI: You need a shower.
ME: Don't judge me - I'm unemployed now and I can NOT shower if I want to.
MIYAGI: Fine. I won't judge you, but can I have a new squeaky toy?
ME: I gave you like three of them yesterday.
MIYAGI: I know, but I already de-squeaked those and they are therefore dead to me. Can I have another one??
ME: *sigh* FINE. Here you go.
And now I've got the sounds of the racecar, The Price is Right, and a squeaky toy.
Thank god you are taking a Lady of Leisure Summer, to which I can follow your incredibly entertaining and hilarious blogs so that I, myself, don't go crazy while I'm away all summer!
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